Why Can't I Be the Parent I Want to Be?

Book Description

This is a breakthrough book. Parents don't need any more advice on how to raise their children. Most parents already know what to do. What parents do need is to recognize the emotional obstacles that keep them from carrying out all the good advice they've already gotten and that prevent them from doing what's best for their kids.

These emotional obstacles are known as schemas. These schemas act like lenses that exert a surprisingly powerful influence upon our lives. This is the first book to show parents how to recognize their own problem schemas and take steps to stop making the same mistakes, over and over again.

The authors teach through highly engaging stories. You will learn about the emotional obstacles to good parenting by observing three families in a fascinating journey of self-discovery. You will be touched by these families' hopes, fears, dreams, vulnerabilities, and humanness. And you'll learn from their struggles as they grapple with adversity, unexpected events, frustration, hope, and change.

Thank you, the Publisher
Gretchen Gold\New Harbinger Publications

Customer Reviews:

Good only for parents with no common sense.......2006-12-29

I found this book to be extremely patronizing in examples, premises and approach to categorizing problems.

NOT recommended, except possibly for those with little to no self-awareness.

How to be the parent we want to be...............2000-07-02

In Why Can't I Be the Parent I Want to Be?, the authors assure parents that they already know what to do, but oftentimes fail to do what they know is right. This is usually due to some emotional obstacle that prevents parents from following through on their good intentions. The authors do a great job in explaining why parents get caught up in these emotional struggles, how to recognize problems and learn to be the parent they want to be.

Though written by psychologists (and with a foreword written by psychologist John Rosemond), the book - while scholarly - is quite easily understood and is an enjoyable read. They use the stories of three families to teach the various principles, which is one thing that makes the book so enjoyable. While the stories of the three families may not be identical to our own, there is much we can all relate to in them.

This book is for any parent who welcomes a common-sense approach to parenting. It also helps parents to assess their parenting style and then gives practical suggestions for change when needed, how to set parenting goals, and specific ways of getting there. The authors use the word "schema" quite a bit. They say that schemas are what we all use to make sense of the world, and that schemas help people create meaning about who they are. Schemas categorize and organize information. Knowing what schemas are is helpful to parents, they say, so parents won't have to struggle to be the parent they want to be. It was fascinating to learn what schemas are, how they are formed, and how the knowledge of schemas can be of help in parenting.

I especially found Chapter Five helpful and interesting. Entitled "Beyond Insight, Preparing for Action," it tells how to take action after we've gained the insight we need as parents, and these actions help us to make meaningful changes in our parenting. There are more exercises in this chapter to do which are fun, and helps us to understand further what our goals are and what we need to do to reach them. I found it quite helpful and enlightening and definitely recommend others try it, too.

I enjoyed reading, and learning from, this book very much, and I know others will, too. It is thoughtfully, creatively written and useful for all parents.

Recommended for anyone seeking to improve parenting skills........2000-04-07

Charles Elliott and Laura Smith collaborate to teach about parenting through the use of stories as the employ three families to take the reader on a journey toward improving themselves to become better, more effective parents. Each family present specific parenting problems: Debra and Quinton (the overprotective mother who blames her son's behavior problems on others and the son who constantly gets into trouble at school); Jennifer and Jerod (the mother who can't say no to her son and blames herself for his problems, and the son who faces a possible second stay in the detention center); Kenneth, Sally, Lindsey and Nick (Ken loves his wife and kids but is driving them away with his constant criticism and control, while Sally is ready to give up on their marriage, and their kids, Lindsey and Nick, retaliate with silence or sarcasm). Why Can't I Be The Parent I Want To Be? enables the readers to discover their own "schemas", their repetitive nature, and the power they wield as parents as its guides them toward self-understanding, self-acceptance, and innovative ways of changing both thought and behavior. By the time the last page is read and the book set down, the readers will have discovered how to be the parents that already exist in their hearts and hopes.

An Amazing Helpful Book!.......1999-10-28

This was a very helpful book for me! I am the parent of 4 very energetic kids and I have gone to many parenting classes and read lots of parenting books, all gave advice but I could never follow the advice. This book was written for the everyday parent in a language that even I can understand. They gave me advice and solutions to help control my temper and help me with some parenting advice that I really needed! My kids are more under control and listen to what I say! Thanks alot to the writers of this book! Me and my kids are doing alot better!

Book Description

A straightforward, gripping tale from the Marines that stormed ashore on Guadalcanal in World War II. Told with humor and honesty in a no-holds-barred approach that only a Marine who was there could tell. Excerpt on firing a rifle grenade: "I jammed the rifle stock tight against my shoulder, raised myself up off the ground to a kneeling position, and squeezed the trigger. The rifle went bang! And the recoil jarred it loose from my grip. The rifle smacked me hard in the jaw. With that, I went down on my face while the little bluebirds started going tweet, tweet, tweet around my head. 'Did I hit it?' I asked. 'Yeah, you hit it,' Flash said. 'The damn thing just didn't work. 'We finally ran into somebody from another unit, a guy who really understood how the new style grenade was supposed to work. We explained our misfortune to him, and he asked us did you pull the firing pin out . . . The god damn pin!"

Customer Reviews:

Fantastic Account.......2007-07-29

This was a gripping, fascinating read. I read this immediately after reading Eugene B. Sledge's _With the Old Breed_ (also very highly recommended) and it was hard not to compare the two. Unlike _Old Breed_, _On the Canal_ is a series of essays (many of which originally appeared in the "Guadalcanal Echoes" newsletter). This is occasionally confusing since the book goes back and forth in time quite a bit as a result. Also unlike Sledge's book, Marion's recollections are occurring well after the fact. As a result, you don't get so much of the wild-eyed awe of youth, but instead get a lot more of an adult's understanding of what he did as a kid. Whereas _Old Breed_ is almost always serious and traumatic (also very possibly the result of Peleliu and Okinawa being bloodier than Guadalcanal), _On the Canal_ is often humorous, though serious enough when necessary.

This book is a great way to get to know Guadalcanal from the POV of a rifle platoon Marine. I'm very happy it got put together.

Good book! but sad...............2007-05-23

My grampa ed wrote this book. I REALLY recemened this book from peaple that like to read about world war 2, although the book is sad. (well of course its sad)I never met my uncle ore (my dads, moms, brother) even though i was born 1995 and he died 2003..... even though war is a terrible thing.... this book is very good.

Get the real story.......2004-06-15

Unlike other books I've read on the Guadalcanal campaign, this book is unique in that it covers the battle from the perspective of the individual marines who fought and died in their "spider-holes." Like Ambrose's BAND OF BROTHERS, the stories help one understand how battle and war forge unbreakable life-long bonds of friendship amongst soldiers on the company, platoon and squad levels. Fought in the most primitive of circumstances, with little food, ammo, or basic necessities, these marines made a stand that turned out to be a critical turning point in the War in the Pacific. Marion recounts the fierce fighting that took place, as well as the more mundane and humorous aspects of life as a common marine trying to survive this hell-hole. It's filled with the usual grousing about rear echelon officers and navy brass that give it an authentic feel.

ON THE WATER.......2004-05-28

This book is a must read for those interested in World War 11 history. It is a true story as told by M.Sgt.Ore J. Marion, USMC, of the retaking of Guadalcanal from the Japanese, a pivotal battle. Beyond that all Americans should read it because it clearly relates the horror of war.

"On the Canal" is a day-to-day accounting of a company of Marines who were deserted by the Navy after being dropped off on this jungle island on August 7, 1942. They were left without reinforcements, ammunition, medical supples, clothing and most of all food. After they exhausted their food supply, they existed on rice filled with maggots. By late September their clothes were rags, they all suffered from malaria or diarrhea, and they were physically weakened from lack of food and sleep. The battle stories in the newspapers never mentioned the conditions the Marines existed under.

Marion tells about the bonding between the Marines and how they knew each other so well that they instinctively knew every other man's moves whether on patrol or in battle. They knew very well that their lives depended upon each other and they all suffered from the terrible loss of comrades in batle.

They were also at times subjected to the actions or lack of action of an imcompetent officer whose decisions could lead to deadly consequences. In spite of all this their morale remained high and they never lost their determination to succeed. And succeed they did four months later.

We read and hear daily about our troop in Afghanistan and Iraq but we know little about their daily life. Hopefully there has been improvements over the last 62 years but as the Marines on Guadalcanal quickly discovered, in war, the best laid plans can quickly go awry.

Product Description

The complete 18 volume set. Published between 1952 and 1983

Book Description

Imagine it has been nearly two hundred years since hunters killed the last of the trumpeter swans living in the eastern part of North America. Now that the birds are protected by law, scientists hope to return the birds to their former range in the East. However, trumpeter swans must learn their migration routes from their parentsso scientists are taking on the role of parent swans in the Trumpeter Swan Migration Project, teaching cygnets to follow ultralight aircraft in an effort to reintroduce a migrating population to the Atlantic coast.

Customer Reviews:

Project Ultraswan.......2003-01-16

This is an incredible book for all ages!! The pictures are beautiful and the text very educational. What a great project(Trumpeter Swan Migration Project) to be involved with. This book is very high quality for a small price!!!!

Scientists in the Field #6: Project Ultraswan

Average customer rating:

Scientists in the Field #6: Project Ultraswan
Elinor Osborn
Manufacturer: Houghton Mifflin Company
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover
ASIN: B000N7CLH0

Average customer rating:

Moive

Temptations Updated Book

Otis Williams and the updated Temptations book.

Temptations,Updated

Temptations

Temptations, Updated
Otis Williams
Manufacturer: Cooper Square Press
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

General | Composers & Musicians | Arts & Literature | Biographies & Memoirs | Subjects | Books
Rhythm & Blues | Composers & Musicians | Arts & Literature | Biographies & Memoirs | Subjects | Books
African-American & Black | Ethnic & National | Biographies & Memoirs | Subjects | Books
General | Ethnic & National | Biographies & Memoirs | Subjects | Books
General | Biographies & Memoirs | Subjects | Books
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Get Ready: Definitive Performances 1965-1972 [DVD] - The Temptations

The Temptations

Dreamgirl & Supreme Faith, Updated Edition: My Life as a Supreme

Divided Soul: The Life of Marvin Gaye

Forever Faithful! A Study of Florence Ballard and the Supremes

ASIN: 0815412185

Book Description

The Temptations were the most commercially successful and critically lauded male vocal group of the '60s and '70s. Through the years, the group's trademark razor-sharp choreography, finely tuned harmonies, and compelling vocals made them the exemplars of the Motown style. This is the frank, revealing story of the legendary supergroup, told by its founder, Otis Williams.

Customer Reviews:

Moive.......2007-08-08

I am in the process of reading the book and i like it so far but i love the moive sooooooo much i watch it like everyday its addicting! I'm probally the youngest temptations fan i'm 14 years old and love them ..... my favorites are eddie and david i think they are the best voices.

let me close by saying the tempts willl never die and i thinkt their the best group ever! noone can top them

Temptations Updated Book.......2007-07-20

I love the Temptations, and this is an outstanding book. It gives you all of the history that wasn't in the movie. It is a must have for all Temptations fans.

Otis Williams and the updated Temptations book........2007-05-14

I just finished reading the updated Temptations book which I bought at the Temptations concert at the Orleans Hotel Casino in Las Vegas on April 12th, 2007. I was fortunate to be in the 2nd row and Otis shook my hand at the end of the concert.

I have seen the mini series several times and bought the dvd. I also bought the 'Get Ready' dvd with clips of various Temptations songs. One of my favorite video/songs is Paul Williams: "Don't look back"

I really enjoyed Otis's book and especially the update. I do not agree that Otis dissed any of the other original Tempts as some reviewers claim. It is only natural that each person will have a somewhat different perspective of events.

As a 60 year old white man who attended a high school in South Phoenix with a large African American population, I have seen the impact that Motown and especially the Temptations had on race relations.
I have seen very prejudiced white guys who would change their attitudes as they related to Tempts music and lyrics. Otis was right when he said he thought their music had something to do with 'the rope' being taken down.

I have a great deal of admiration for Otis Williams. He obviously is a very spiritual man who has endured many loses in his life. If not for his spiritual beliefs, he may have followed the path of David's self destruction.

It was so cool at last month's concert to see many races of people singing, laughing, giving each other high fives. After the concert, many of us congregated outside the showroom lobby and shared memories and discussed our favorite Tempt songs.

I just wanted to say that Ron Tyson in my opinion, is every bit a classic Temp.

Terry Weeks must be channeling Paul Williams spirit. His dancing and moves certainly reminded me of Paul.

Anyway thanks to Otis for keeping the Tempts music alive.

Temptations,Updated.......2007-03-29

This is Otis version of things. I enjoyed the book,but I would like to know more about the outing of David Ruffin.I remember at the time it was said that Berry Gordy was the reason,because he allowed The Supremes to change their name to Diana Ross and The Supremes.,But did not put David Ruffin Ahead of Temptations. It was rumored Berry and Diana had a thing going on. David could not compete with that.I would love to hear other Temp`s view of things. Maybe Dennis Edwards will write his story.It was an intresting read and gave insite into the death of Melvin and Eddie that I did not know.

Temptations.......2006-10-13

I thought the book was exceptionally short for a body of work lasting 45 years. Great pictures though.

I had some major problems with the writing itself. It's like 45 years went by in a blur and he was an observer and not a participant.

He didn't seem to take much interest in his bandmates, there's very little known about Eddie, Paul, David and Melvin. For a man with the inside track, very little is revealed. The book seems to be more about him and not the Temptations.

He seemed also to forget certain facts, like, David was indeed married when he started seeing Tammi Terrell. When she announced that she and David were engaged back in the early sixties, is when she found out David was already married and couldn't marry her. (This also around the time her headaches started.) I don't what the relationship between Geena and Otis is/was, but for him to leave her and Davids' son out of the book was wrong, totally wrong. He acknowledged the others' wives, why not Geena?

Another thing that disturbed me was Otis' "my way or the highway" attitude toward his group members. Truly adolescent behavior. When he wasn't scouting out women, he was scouting out new talent. (But I guess in his mind it's the same thing). ,"just in case so and so doesn't work out", seems to me, he was waiting on the inevitable. He comes off as arrogant and overbearing. "No one man's bigger than the group." Like Eddie said in the movie, "Who is the group for, who did "it" make sacrifies for?"

OTIS, knows good and well, that he and Melvin could not have carried the group on their own. Eddie, Paul, and David didn't need "the group", as much as "the group" needed them. David and Eddie saw the writing on the wall between Barry and Otis, well before hand and did the smart thing and got out. I wish Paul had as well, alive. Otis should have thought more of his "brothers" and fought for them. He waited too long. Too bad he used the book to trash them when they're not here to defend themselves.

With three ex-wives and 15 ex-Temps on the roster, maybe it would do Otis good to look inside himself and not place blame everywhere or to everyone.

Paul and Eddie brought style and sophistication and experience. As well as their voices. David, brought the fire and raw sex appeal they needed. And last, but not least, Melvin, with that bottom drawer, under the floor bass. There's no one else like him. Have to give Dennis his "props" too. He may not be an original Temp, but because of him, they got their first of many Grammys to come.

Otis should be more greatful, he and Eddie forged a supergroup we'll never see again. He's not one-fifth as talented as his current or original band-mates. If he could sing, we'd know about it. He's a man that needed a group and he got one. Each man brought with him his own set of baggage, but they were the best.

They will be missed through out time.

Thanks for the music, guys, Where ever you are, (we know you're together) take a bow. We love you.

Book Description

In the years 1809 to 1814, the first battalion of the Connaught Rangers were to lose 49 out of 103 officers killed or wounded and gain eleven battle honours whilst earning their nickname, µThe Devil's Own', as part of General Picton's 3rd Division. Modest, brave and with a keen sense of humour, Grattan's reminiscences form not only a graphic chronicle of such conflicts as Busaco, Ciudad Rodrigo, Badajoz and Salamanca, where the regiment repeatedly covered itself with glory, but also provides an unusually entertaining account of the Irish soldier in and out of battle, from information regarding pay, promotion, food, clothing, the author's views of Spain and the Spanish, and his thoughts on a variety of commanders. All this lifts his narrative to the front rank of Peninsular autobiographies. This is the first appearance of this classic book as a paperback.

Customer Reviews:

Classic!.......2004-12-02

This is a classic Napoleonic memoir, and is a must read for anyone interested in the Peninsular War, the British Army, or the everyday lives of soldiers. Grattan is one of the great military memoirists, combining a descriptive and highly readable writing style with a great sense of humor. Get this book!

Adventures with the Connaught Rangers, from 1809 to 1814,

Average customer rating:

Adventures with the Connaught Rangers, from 1809 to 1814,
William Grattan
Manufacturer: E. Arnold
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Unknown Binding

Average customer rating:

Truth to Power

A deserved kick in the shins to teachers unions

Just another objective journalist?

GREAT book!

Cheating Our Kids: How Politics and Greed Ruin Education
Joe Williams
Manufacturer: Palgrave Macmillan
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover
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ASIN: 140396839X
Release Date: 2005-09-15

Book Description

Journalist Joe Williams shows how parents can use consumer power to put children first, shining light on the special interests controlling our schools, where politics and pork infuse everything and our children's education is compromised. He argues that increased accountability and choice are necessary, and shows how the people can take back the education system, enhancing responsibility inherent in democracy. The solution is a new brand of hardball politics that demands competence from school leaders and shifts the power away from bureaucrats and union leaders to the people who have a the greatest reason to put kids first: concerned parents. With practical steps and uplifting examples of success, this is a manifesto to action.

Customer Reviews:

Truth to Power.......2007-09-24

Trying to find how school districts work is difficult. Transparency is hard to come by and this is deliberately so. Joe Williams breaks down the wall of obfuscation, the lies, and tells it like it is. My only regret is that he does not site more examples of the corruption that goes on in building new schools.

Los Angeles Unified School District is in the midst of a $19 billion school construction project - the largest in U.S. History. Precious little has been written about this monumental and historical occurence. I fear that the Fourth Estate is not up to the task of protecting the public. What editor would allow a reporter to spend months researching the byzantine passages of public construction bids, self-dealing, and the intracacies of change orders? It would win a Pulitzer if done right, but the economics of the newspaper business make it a remote possibility. Many reporters have to produce three to four stories a week! How can they dive into the five hundred layers of confusion in two days and write a credible story? Even if they spent three months, they would barely tap the surface.

That's why Joe Williams book is so important. It is an amazing start.
I just bought 12 copies of this book for my parent leaders.

A deserved kick in the shins to teachers unions.......2005-10-29

Teachers unions, as most informed citizens know, have done more to damage schools in the last 50 years than any other entity. These groups raely if ever put kids first, instead installing a system where it is next to impossible to fire teachers while convincing vast chunks of the general public that hard luck teachers are somehow underpaid (ha!). Bravo to this illuminating work!

Just another objective journalist?.......2005-10-28

While I applaud Williams' title, I am amazed at the amount of politics and greed behind the author. With a special thanks to Fred M. Hess in the intro, and a plug from Mr. Hess on the back cover, I wonder how Williams gets past all of Hess's politics? The book was obviously supported by the neoconservative/neoliberal Right, something most readers won't ever know. Perhaps this book belongs under propaganda rather than education...Not that there's a difference under this administration, given the million dollars spent on convincing African Americans to buy into NCLB. (Google Ketchum, Armstrong Williams, and GAO)

Williams is just another shrill for the far Right, arguing that business leaders need to do more to save our failing schools...As if they haven't already done enough! Business leaders do not, have not, and will never put children first...they put buisness first. It's corporate leaders, and media lap-dogs like Williams, who are responsible for the current disaster most call NCLB, a disaster pushing good teachers and good students out of good schools. Standards and accountability! Ha. Let's get some into the media and White House first...perhaps they'll trickle down...

Until we recognize that we should be living in a democracy, a social system that requires critical and engaged citizens, we can expect more of the same from the Anti-School movement: our schools are failing, our schools are failing, our schools are failing, and the only way to save them is by turning children into hyper productive worksheet completers. Yes, capable of working 55 hour weeks sans complaint but incapable of challenging the whys and hows of global democracy. Likely to consume what you tell them to consume but unlikely to ask why we consume so much...Is that the future we really want?

I can't believe this book came from an academic press.

GREAT book!.......2005-10-01

I just finished reading Williams's book and HIGHLY recommend it. In it, he exposes in great detail the many outrageous ways that our public school system is controlled by adults and run for their benefit, rather than the children. It's infuriating, yet also hopeful, as he shows how Milwaukee's parents were able to win enormous changes, and outlines a guidebook for parents and activists everywhere.

Book Description

Discover the mysterious and fascinating ways in which animals and plants—and people—interact with one another in the rainforests of Costa Rica. Author and naturalist Jack Ewing shares a wealth of observations and experiences, gathered from more than three decades of living in southwestern Costa Rica, home to some of the most prolific and diverse ecosystems on Earth. More than just a simple collection of essays, Monkeys are Made of Chocolate is a testament to the wonder of life in all its countless guises, as seen through the eyes of a man with a gift for subtle discernment and a natural flair for storytelling.

Customer Reviews:

Great nature stories.......2007-04-11

I have to tell you that this was one of the very best nature books I have read in a long time. It has great stories, it is super-engaging, and it has a wonderful yet not overpowering environmental message.

A 'must' for any who plan on seeing the country and who want to know more of its wildlife and habitats.......2006-06-24

Most books on Costa Rica focus on travel tips, but MONKEYS ARE MADE OF CHOCOLATE: EXOTIC AND UNSEEN COSTA RICA takes a different turn, examine how animals, plants and people interact in that country and providing over thirty essays which come from a conversion of a cattle ranch into a popular eco-tourism destination. Stories and essays provide literally decades of observation of the Costa Rican natural environment and its management. A 'must' for any who plan on seeing the country and who want to know more of its wildlife and habitats.

Diane C. Donovan
California Bookwatch

Costa Rica Wildlife.......2006-02-26

This book gives an excellent overall review of the Pacific rainforest and it's inhabitants in Pacific Costa Rica while encouraging the reader to contemplate preservation of the fragile ecosystems. Very readable. I recommend it to interested travellers to the region.

Read This, You'll Never Know How Much It Would Have Changed You If You Don't.......2006-01-13

All I can say is: read it, you'll love it! (as well as learn more than you probably learn in a year of science class, change the way you think about the world, have a better understanding of what nature really is, be highly entertained, want to gather everyone you know and read them entire chapters [or the whole book!] be recomending this book like crazy...you get the idea)

Great Storyteller! .......2005-06-06

This book is a series of easy-to-digest short stories and essays by a good storyteller. Some are lightweight and merely entertaining, some are likely to change your life. Over 30 years the author, who was born and raised on the midwest plains, gradually turned a typical Central America cattle ranch into a premier eco-resort. By simply being open to what the land and environment were trying to do, some amazing and highly encouraging lessons are taught. The environmental future shown here is lush, varied, and hopeful. This is a bright ray in a field that tends too much toward doom and gloom.

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